March 6-28, 2006: Mission Trip to Nicaragua

When my nephew, David George, asked me to be prayer leader for the La Familia Feliz Seminario (Happy Family Seminar) he and his wife, Lu would hold in her hometown of Chinandega, I was thrilled. Wish I knew Spanish!

March 3, 2006

Here I am two days before the start of one of the biggest adventures of my life, feeling tired and with (of all things) a case of jitters,(defined as dis-ease inside). I have been so very excited about going to Nicaragua and have enjoyed all the preparations until today. It ‘s unusual for me to feel jitters about anything these days.

“So now, Lord, I let all these concerns go and enter the Sabbath with you. I praise You for the pre-parations that are completed—the texts in Spanish, plans for presenting Prayer Journals for the orphans, and for active worships for the young team members centered on Prayer. My lists are almost completed and will easily be finished tomorrow night. I am very eager and happy. Only just very tired.”

Oh yes, I was lonely today. It is such a big thing to me and I am doing it alone. I can’t lift the big

suitcase and it’s even hard to pull the carry-on. I will need someone to lift it into the carry-on space. This all makes me feel vulnerable and dependent. My, my. How I do like my independence.

I think loneliness was part of the down of this day. But on Sunday when my dear nephew, Dave, Lu, and the young people meet me in Houston I won’t be alone, but will share the adventure with them. What Joy that will be. “Forgive me, Lord, for this weak day. It’s not the beginning of the trip—only a little blip in the eagerness and excitement of getting ready. Thank you for the confidence in You for this adventure. ”

This verse from Andrew Murray’s The True Vine becomes my prayer:

“Oh, struggle not to ‘abide’, nor labor to ‘bring forth fruit’.
But let Jesus unite me to Himself, as the Vine Branch to the root.
So simple, so deep, so strong that union with Him shall be:
His life shall forever replace my own, And His love shall flow through me.
For His Spirit’s fruit is love. And love shall my life become,
and forevermore on His heart of love my Spirit shall have its home.” — Freda Hanbury

March 4, 2006

We sang this song in church today and they dedicated the last verse to me on my journey.

“Let your heart be broken for a world in need.
Feed the mouths that hunger, soothe the wounds that bleed.
Give a cup of water and a loaf of bread.
Be the hands of Jesus serving in His stead.
Let your heart be tender and your vision clear;
See mankind as God sees, serve Him far and near.
Let your heart be broken by a brother’s pain
Share your rich resources—give and give again.”

March 6, 2006

We have arrived in Central America!

Travel day was smooth as the skins of mangoes here. Melodie, David and Emily took me to the airport in Albuquerque. Grandson David handled my heavy luggage and I got an earlier flight to Houston so the concern about baggage was pointless—as was all the earlier “jitters”. Flights were pleasant all the way. Meeting my family and the team (five teenagers: Elannah, Yuel, Steven, Kevin and Chad) in Houston was just right.

We arrived in Managua, Nicaragua and were met by Lu’s sister. Her home is “maravillosa” with a courtyard in the middle where the breeze cools us. Two good-sized tents are up where the kids sleep. Big mango trees tower over us and occasionally a mango drops. I woke to the sound of a bird which seemed to say, “The Lord brought you here where you will learn much from these dear people. And He will give you gifts from your heart to give to them. Thank you, Lord, I hear you.

Give me all the energy I need for today.”

March 8, 2006

Today we go to Chinandega by van—all of us together. We’ve been traveling in two taxis—a very big adventure when we went to Granada on Monday. Taxi drivers us their horns to weave around bikes on which one to three people carry all manner of things, and horse-drawn conveyances of various types, buses, trucks and many people walking. It took a day to get used to that (near misses and how it all works with little traffic control). I saw red lights but no police.

On Monday we went through a moving art and music building. Then to a restaurant at the edge of a volcano crater overlooking Lake Nicaragua. Three mariaches sang for us, service was superb and the food unique and delicious. We were the only ones there. Elannah and I shared a bed in a little hotel.

Tuesday was a highlight day. We drove by huge jeep straight up (it seemed) around many curves to the top of a volcano where we hiked on top about two hours. Then back down (holding tightly) and to the lake around some of the 300 islands in a boat. Delightful!!! We stopped and picked up two bags of mangos that had fallen from the trees. Then a ride on a packed bus back to Managua for the night.

I was afraid to go on the jeep ride (as I heard it described), and I am so grateful I chose to go. It was a true adventure. It seemed the jeep was a bit like a roller coaster, although half was all up and half was all down—with curves. The orchids growing in the fields, the wonderful, huge variety of trees, even the coral snake that quickly crawled over the path and away from us , the comraderie, the view of the lake where the volcano deposited all the islands—would have been a big loss to miss.

The two hour hike I will never forget. There was a lot of up and down. Yuel helped me some and Dave, too, when I needed a shoulder to lean on. Then Kevin (the big, strong sixteen year old Cree native) took over the job. First I put my hand on his shoulder for the big steps and steep places—a reach for me. After a while my knees started hurting a lot I put my hand in his big one and leaned.

(I told him he was my walking stick—only better.) I would have had a hard time without him at the last of it. But he stuck with me, talking along the way as the others went on ahead.

On the jeep ride back down the mountain Kevin sat with me and put his arm around me to keep me from hitting the side of the jeep. It was very bouncy. “Thank you, Lord, for Kevin. He was like You–gentle and present. I could lean on him and when the way got harder I had my hand in his where I really leaned. Then on the scary trip his arm around me made me not afraid. Thank You for Your gentle presence that never leaves me and thank You that once in a while we get to be like You to each other.”

“Thank You that you remind me that as the path of life gets rougher I learn to lean harder and Your hand is there to hold me.”

March 10, 2006

“God, I want to be full of Your Spirit in this place. I believe You give this and that You will continue to give it.” May it be the real I who speaks. May it be the real God I speak to.

Today is the first evangelistic meeting in Chinandega. There is much to praise. “I praise You, Holy Spirit for leading in the Prayer Journals worship. Everyone was involved and I believe, moved by the picture of Jesus holding the little black lamb that my sister sent. You did it, Holy One, and I loved being here and watching you work.”

Another highlight of the day was the trip to the Pacific Ocean—hurried as it was. Everyone went in the water except me. This was the first beach experience for some of our group. I enjoyed their first-time-at-the-ocean delight. What a privilege! As we walked along the water we found many shells, and were refreshed with the fresh coconut milk (sipped through a straw from the coconut.)

The other joy was the good attendance at the Seminar and meeting with 25 or so people who are helping with the meetings. Their enthusiastic singing, their warmth, blessed me greatly. They have been meeting at the church at 5:00 a.m. to pray. “Thank You, Lord! May I take back this dedication to You, may it spread to the dear ones at home. ” This a.m. Elannah (my roommate and grand niece) and I are moving slowly. Even had a nap. Now I’m ready to be involved the rest of the day and be a part of the entire experience.

I had worships planned for each day, but now it seems Dave wants the teenagers to lead out too. “Lord, I’m ready to have you use me or not be used at all. What I have to give, You give me and I am content. Tonight I meet with the Prayer Groups. I give that to You. May my words be Yours. May Your Spirit enrich and fill each pray-er and may Your power and Your grace change lives.”

March 13, 2006

Days are so full, there’s little time to write. Today I chose a nap, a shower and quiet time over going to the market. It’s been good. Last night at the meeting I was too tired to linger long in the prayer room. I was very blessed Friday night praying with the dear people who came to the prayer room. They pray fervently—I would say passionately—long and loud. I sit (or stand) among them and silently ask, “Lord, teach me to pray.” I wondered if they were disturbing those near us in the meeting—the other side of the open grate partition. But no one seemed to notice. Meetings are not quiet, but spirited and alive.

March 17, 2006

Our time here is half gone and I am fighting (or giving into) the fatigue of heat, the intensity of so much to do and almost always running late and most of all my lack of reflective time with You, Jesus. In my reading this morning I am reminded: “‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me’. A sense of helplessness and the abiding to which it compels, leads to true fruitfulness and diligence in good works.”

The True Vine “Oh Jesus, how often I have experienced that when I come to the end of myself, YOU are able to live through me. What happens then doesn’t have to be evaluated or measured, it is just lived—an overflowing fountain.”

“Jesus, please fill me with love today for these dear ones with whom I work, for the team, for the people who pray, and for that auditorium filled with people who need more of You, as we all do.

Make the love overflow in ways that grow fruit. Your promise is fruitfulness. I am a tiny branch and feeble, but longing only to be part of You, the Vine that produces not mine, but Your fruit.

Thank You, LORD, I depend on you fully. Keep me abiding in You through this whole day.”

Later—”Thank You, Lord, for the worships we have had together. Today I was blessed when we shared Joys of our time here and ‘peticiones’ for the rest of the time. What Joy! I feel acceptance and love from each of the five young people and, of course, Dave and Lu. Thank You, Jesus, for reviving me today. I sense Your Life and Your presence.”

March 17, 2016

This whole week I have not managed to write much. Now on Friday with my swollen feet up I will record some highlights:

1. Last Sabbath visiting the El Viejo Church—the beautiful people, many of them ninos y ninas worshipping in a small space with a dirt floor on which they kneel to pray. We sit on benches in that simple, sacred space. The alter is painted yellow and covered with yellow lace. The crowded room, open on each side, is noisy, yet reverent. Wholeheartedly the people worship, and sing. I join them with Joy. A brother and sister (ages perhaps 9 and 12) provide special music in harmony. Beautiful! The people respond eagerly to Dave’s sermon. I will see many of them at the meeting tonight

2. Sunday morning at the beach. Coconuts, hammocks and walk along the ocean in the cool breeze

3. The prayers of the people in the side room at each meeting. Sometimes I pray with them. When I sit listening to their prayers ascending around me like incense straight to God’s throne, I join them with tears. My prayer is a simple lifting of my heart to You because there are no words to describe these moments.”

4. The sense of awe I have when I am with the children at the orphanage. First comes the emotion of pain for what each of these children have suffered. But then as I see the gentleness and love with which they are treated I praise God for rescuing them and for the miracle of this home. The story of Felix and Angelica and the thirty-two children they rescued and nurture, should be told in detail. (And it was published in the Adventist Review April 13, 2000 under the title, ‘A World of Hurt.’ by the late Evelyn Trefz, a dedicated supporter of Casa Hogar Fuente de Vida.)

This is just a brief summary: Life can be hard in a country of hurricanes, earthquakes, volcano eruptions and mudslides. The twins Angelica gave birth to could not survive when the electricity at the hospital failed. But before long their arms were filled with young victims of disasters and many children have called them Mama and Papa.

Through their personal sacrifice; the help of ICC and other donations, they were able to build a home for the orphans. Today I see that the boys and girls are well fed and clothed and loved. Their lives are structured to meet their spiritual, educational and social needs. God bless Papa Felix and Mama Angelica with renewed strength and grace.

These are the words (in Spanish, of course) on the cupula at the orphanage:

“God make my life a song that will comfort the sad.
Make my life a hymn of prayer and tenderness.
God make my life a light that will shine in the world.
God make my life a flower that will make everybody happy.”

March 18, 2006

Only one more short week here in Chinandega. The boys are ready to go home. A little part of me is ready too! I’m very tired—of the heat and the dirt and all the work to be done. I’m tired of continual contact with people and so little space.

But no, I don’t want to go home yet. Two important things have not happened yet. One is something God is giving me for our team. It’s not quite ready yet, but I’m burning to share it. It’s about how God heals our wounds, forgives us and helps us forgive ourselves and those who hurt us which gives us a new identity and hope. I deeply want this written in their journals before we leave.

Also, I want to present the Prayer Journals and colored pens to the children at Casa Hogar Fuente de Vida.

“If you abide in me and my words abide in you, ask whatever you will and it will be done for you.”

John 15:7 The healthy life of the believer is one of unceasing prayer. Consciously or unconsciously, he lives in continual dependence. Unbroken must be his asking and receiving.”

“Oh, Jesus, this I ask, with all my heart—believing–give me the health and strength that I might give these two gifts this week. I give my tiredness to You and praise You for the way you have given strength, for the worship by the ocean and the one where we shared in our journals our caring for each other. As everyone’s energy (and even desire to be here) lags, oh, Jesus, give new life to each of us. Use me today as a blessing to everyone I meet. Continue to give Dave and Lu and all of us strength. And thank You for giving me my heart’s desire here. I reach out to receive Your promise knowing it is true.”

March 20, 2006

“Lord of my life, I praise You for yesterday and the new strength You gave. Dave and Lu visited a family that all gave their hearts to Jesus. While they were gone jobs here were finished and we had worship. Thank You that it went so well. The team wrote about their feelings in their journals and we focused on Philippians 4:4-7. Yuel played guitar and everyone sang enthusiastically.

Then came quiet time. “Quiet” is an interesting word since a very loud band played next door in celebration of a child’s birthday. I napped anyway, until the firecrackers went off. I don’t jump as much as I did originally. Getting used to these four boy’s fireworks fun! I so love and appreciate the relationship I have with these five young people. I treasure each and feel treasured and cared for by all of them.

March 23, 2006

“Just as the Father has loved me, I also have loved you.” We need to “sense the intensity of the personal affection in which Christ embraces us. . . Shall we not draw near to the personal living Christ and trust Him and yield all to Him that He may love His love into us?” The True Vine

“Lord, here I am in this sanctuary of Casa de la Abolita. The “family” has gone to another volcano for an all day adventure—horseback riding, etc. I am drinking in the early a.m. bird songs, quietness and life from You. I would enjoyed going but everyday the swelling in my feet has been more troublesome and I have stayed here, also, to try to break the cycle and recoup in every way.”

What Joys yesterday held! We went to Casa Hogar Fuente de Vida (the home provided for the orphans by Felix and Angelica). The children really liked the journals and especially the pens. I think they will use them and my Joy is full. They have been through so much loss and sadness in their young lives. I asked them to write their prayers and their feelings in the journals. The Holy Spirit was very present as I told the story of my sister getting the journals and of Phyllis’ paying for the colored pens. “Thank You, Lord, for the Joy of that dream fulfilled.”

Last night at the meeting Lu asked me to come up and tell about the Bibles from my home church in Los Alamos, New Mexico. Through her translation I was able to speak and the dear people were so responsive and eager. Then everyone who had been baptized came up and I gave each one a Bible and a hug. Afterwards many came with hugs It was a precious time. The hunger for God’s Word is real here. Some came who hadn’t been baptized, and I felt sorry not to have a Bible for everyone.

In the prayer room two beautiful things happened. Bayardo came again for me to pray for him. He used the words “sorry”, “problem”, “people”. The Holy Spirit was very close as we knelt, my arm around his shoulder as I prayed. He asked me to “Pray for me forever”. I will.

Later a little girl—around 9 or 10, stood looking in at me. I motioned did she want to pray with me. We knelt. I prayed first. She didn’t pray and after a while I said “Amen” and we got up but she didn’t leave. I sensed she still wanted to pray so we knelt again and very quietly she prayed a much longer prayer than mine. Then she was ready to leave. Later she was there with the others for hugs. What a blessing—the prayers, the simple warmth and spontaneous affection, greetings and smiles are.

My heart is full of Joy. The next night when the lights went out that little girl came and snuggled next to me. “Thank You, Lord, I could be a safe place for her. May she always turn to you for her safety.”

March 25, 2006

Communion Sabbath–

From El Viejo we made a hurried trip to Chinandega Central Church. We enter a place of peace and reverence as we walk into the sanctuary. I am awed by the attention to detail, by the sheer beauty of white flowers, satin, lace, draperies held by cloth doves. The church itself is exquisitly prepared for holy Communion. The Bridegroom is honored by those who love Him. Everyone is invited to the feast—the symbols of His feely given body and blood. The atmosphere is full of celebration and joy. I bow in worship.

March 26, 2006

I left Chinendega with a tired body and a full heart. What a beautiful Sabbath it was with many hugs and tearful good-byes. In this lovely, quiet retreat outside of Leon I am thinking of what I am taking home with me. Mostly it is pictures: of the beautiful, expressive eyes of the Nicaraguan people. Friendly, warm eyes, dark painfilled eyes, pleading eyes. Of arms reaching out to give and receive hugs, to ask for a Bible, to communicate connection without words, of voices raised in prayer—fervent, unhurried prayer, voices raised in song, heartfelt, joyous singing.

I’m taking home a picture of the cemetery decorated with statues picturing angels recognizing the sleep of the dead and pointing to the resurrection, one with a crown in its hand. Poor people investing so much to honor their dead (and their God). I remember the musical bands, the celebrations which lift the people above their daily struggles for a few minutes or hours.

I take home pictures of love: free-flowing, self-sacrificing love. Of smiles in the midst of poverty, joy in spite of suffering Forgiveness and generosity. God’s own love given and received.

March 29, 2006

The greatest Joy at the end of the long flight yesterday was coming off the plane and seeing Melodie and Emmy there to take me home. This a.m. I’m very tired but I woke at 5:30, eager to be up and share the sunrise with You, Lord.

I seem to be in a place to grieve what I didn’t do on the trip. I need to lay it out before You so I can see the whole more clearly. There are many deep emotions and since guilt is at the top, here it is. I grieve not giving a Bible to two people. I was following directions, but now I regret it. And there is the realization that I was not always connected to You on this trip. I did communicate love to people without words. I did reach out to grasp and fully be with all the events we shared, but when I was more tired and in survival mode the connection to You got weaker.

In Nicaragua there are those who live in luxury, extravagance and comfort while the majority struggle to exist. Right now I sit in my comfortable apartment with food, running water, washer and drier and air conditioning while the pain of the world goes on. All of this is about the culture shock part of the trip. I bring it to You, Lord, so you can show me how to live more simply in order to give more.

“So, now I praise you, for your unending patience and love for me. You see it all. Thank You that You see it. I don’t have to unscramble it and as the tears come I sense the love in Your gaze as You see all of my heart—what I recognize or have glimpses of and all that is yet hidden from me. You see my heart and reach out to hold me. Thank You.”